Fathers Day

Every father believes in his role as protector of his family.
He has been assigned the job of fixer and problem-solver.
He has been told since his youngest days that he must be strong, must not cry. But each father among us has had to face that point where no amount of fixing, problem-solving and protecting has been able to stop his child’s death. Inside, we must ask ourselves about our failure and we must face our lack of omnipotence.

Fathers’ Day is often a forgotten holiday, over-shadowed by the longer standing tribute to mothers. But for the bereaved father, it is a poignant reminder of bitter sweetness; sweet in the memory of a loved, now lost child, and bitter for the death and pain and recognition of the inability to stop what happened.

Fathers do not often have a chance to share their hurts and concerns. Often they are unable to do so - a remnant of childhood learnings about strength and stoicism of ‘big boy’. A father may even be uncomfortable opening up to his wife and the wife who pushes him to talk may be pushing him too hard.